whattaday!

i don't think i can take much more depression in my life, because:
1. it's unhealthy
2. it's expensive
3. it makes me think.
(4. oh and it hurts. you'll see why, later)

September 22, 2008. Today is probably the most unusual day i've ever had in my college life. Aside from the unexpected and "depressing" (but not anymore now) news, i think. i've seen the things that can happen to me when i feel this way.

After pouring out the negative feelings, i went back to the dorm to change into comfortable clothes, and went to the mvp basement to meet up with jika and gabby. dolly went with us too. we went to eastwood ("EASE"wood) just to eat ice cream. just because we needed the "comfort" from this comfort food, badly. that trip away from the "real" world was just a fun ride. thank you jika, gabby and dolly. our short trip to "fantasy" world was the best. i couldn't think of a better way to spend it, than with you guys. :) kahit iniiwan na tayo ng taxi (pati ba naman taxi umaayaw sa atin? haha) mahal na mahal ko kayo. :)

i felt so much better after. i heart you all.
(special mention to jose antonio tanjuan, thank you)

so why is being depressed unhealthy.

1. IT IS UNHEALTHY.
we were only planning to splurge on ice cream. dairy queen. BUT NO. we ate lots of stuff.
- dairy queen.. brownie temptation without nuts, 16oz for me. always works.
- gabby's new york fries and lotsa dips...
- jika's green candy sourtapes..
all the unhealthy stuff we can think of. now, my stomach really really hurts, i don't know if my period is coming up after two months of being absent, or it's just because of everything bad i ate. well. i felt good after. so.

i guess it was okay.

2. IT IS EXPENSIVE. why.
- dairyqueen. wooh. spending p90 on a calorie-rich, sinfully fattening brownie temptation is just expensive. i promised i wouldn't spend over p500 this week. but no. i did. today.
- i have a new buddy. in my bed. for the past week, aside from Dora, Aleia and Teddy, someone arrived: Chip. Chip is condom's toy. He asked me if i could keep chip for the meantime, because his parents might think of things when he brings this huge thing home. so. every morning this is what i see.

but i have a new friend. he's not as big as chip, but he sure makes me happy. :) his name is "bebi" inside joke, but bebi is a character from the play i'm in. :)

- and because i was depressed. i shopped. i bought this dress, and when i put it on when i got home, i didn't like how it looked on me. so i'm planning to sell it. if interested, email me at mynameistimeeandiamneat@yahoo.com, it's P300 (L=31.5in, W=15.5in)


3. IT MAKES ME THINK.
well. do i have to explain this. i don't think i can talk about it openly in here, but i just want to say that everything that had just happened made me think if everything was worth it, if i was good enough, if i was waley, if i was doing anything to make my life better, i don't know. i have just thought of a lot of things today, it made my head hurt. really.

4. IT HURTS.
look what i got.


the last time i had my ears pierced was when i was in 2nd year highschool. i was forced to take it off because my school didn't permit extra piercings. and then. there. ask dolly how hard i held his hand. AHAHA

maybe. it was because. the pain i felt hurt more than how much ear-piercing hurt. (aw emo)







but i guess, i'm okay now. i just needed to understand everything. it'll take time to digest it really, but soon, i'll be fine. whew. *breathes deeply*

i can do this.